Father to Son
by Elizabeth Jennings
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The poem expresses the anguish of a father who feels estranged from his own grown son. Though they have lived together in the same house for years, the father complains that he does not understand his child and does not know him at all, they have grown apart and cannot communicate. The father longs for the closeness they might once have had, or that he imagines they should have, and grieves that his son has become a stranger to him. He wishes he could build a bridge of understanding but does not know how, and neither does the son. The father is even willing to forgive and to make a fresh start, feeling the sorrow of the empty space between them 'like a land'. Yet the gulf remains: father and son both suffer, both reach out with 'empty hands' that beg for love and understanding, yet neither is able to bridge the painful distance. The poem poignantly captures the failure of communication and the estrangement that can grow between parents and children.
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A father who cannot understand his son
The father laments that, although he and his son have lived in the same house for years, he does not understand his son and does not know him at all. They share the same home and yet have grown into strangers, unable to reach or communicate with each other. The father feels a deep sense of loss and bewilderment.
Longing for the lost closeness
The father recalls, or imagines, a time of closeness, and grieves that his son now seems to belong to a different world. He wishes he could speak to his son in a way that would bring them together, and mourns that his son has moved away from the ways and world the father knows. He would give anything to build understanding between them.
Willing to forgive, unable to bridge
The father declares he is ready to forgive and to make a fresh start, feeling the sorrow of the empty space between them 'like a land' that separates them. Yet he does not know how to cross it, and neither does the son. Both are trapped by the same failure of communication and the same longing.
Empty hands reaching out
In the final image, father and son both stretch out 'empty hands' that beg for love and understanding, yet neither can grasp the other's. They 'speak like strangers', and the gulf between them remains unbridged. The poem ends on a note of shared pain and unfulfilled longing, capturing the tragedy of estrangement within a family.